Always Been You
by Strawberry L
Summary: Mark and Roger are spending their first Christmas in Santa Fe together, as friends. Uh huh. RogerMark Slash.


Title: Always Been You

By: Strawberry L

Fandom: Rent (Musical)

Pairing: Roger x Mark

Rating: PG-13

Setting: Mark and Roger's first Christmas together in Santa Fe.

Warnings: fluff

Disclaimer: I don't own Rent, duh.

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"Close on Roger, bent over a frying pan of something smelling like… mmm… could it be…? Bacon?!" Mark quickly shut of his camera, setting it on the table in favor of getting a closer inspection of the frying slabs of meat. "What's the occasion Rog?" Mark inquired curiously. It wasn't often they could afford a decent meal, seeing as any money the restaurant made was put immediately back into the restaurant. 

"Breakfast, unless of course you'd rather starve." Roger replied smoothly, teasing his friend.

"Ha ha. What a laugh." Mark poked harshly at the musician, who dodged the worst of the blows. Brushing past Roger, Mark reached into the silverware drawer preparing to set the kitchen table.

"I'd set it for four if I were you." Roger piped up again, his eyes never leaving the bacon. "Benny and Collins should be by any minute, it's Christmas after all. What's Christmas without booze from Collins before noon?"

Mark chuckled before eyeing Roger suspiciously. "Why didn't you wake me up?"

"Knew you'd come to the smell of food." Roger, grinned at his roommate, effortlessly teasing Mark once more. Something had the musician in a blissful mood such as Mark had not seen from him in ages. Moving to Santa Fe had helped Roger settle down some, come to terms with himself in a way, but this was the first time in years he seemed content.

Mark ignored the latest jest, instead focusing on the dishes and the fact that Roger Davis was an ass. He ignored Roger until he had finished cooking the bacon, at which point he moved in on the food, stealing a piece from the paper toweling.

"Hey!" Roger objected, smacking his hand away. "Not until our guests arrive." He chided, moving the plate away from Mark to safety.

"Er, Rog… don't Benny and Collins have to be at work this morning?" Mark mused after a moment of early morning thought. He yawned loudly, still pondering the situation.

"Well shit. I guess we get to eat twice as much then." He didn't stop Mark who reached across him to nab another piece of bacon. Grabbing his own slice, Roger hopped onto the counter, sitting so he was facing Mark. "Merry Christmas, Mark." Roger said, waving the bacon around like he was giving a toast before devouring it in one bite.

"Merry Christmas to you to Roger." Mark couldn't stop a small grin, happy to have a quiet Christmas morning to themselves. After a moment, Mark broke Roger's gaze, his attention turning to the window. It was strange, being from New York, to look outside on Christmas and not see loads of snow. The streets of Santa Fe remained bare, the temperature only in the low 40s.

"Wanna watch a movie while we munch on our bacon?" Roger suggested, already done with a second and third piece. At Mark's nod, Roger removed himself from the counter and followed the shorter boy into their living room. The small house wasn't very big, but it was still a step up from they're old loft. It was neat to be living in their own personal building, something Mark had mentioned he'd never get used to.

The boys ended up on the couch, plate settled comfortably between them. Roger quickly tuned out the movie, his mind focused much more heavily on Mark. Everything in the past year had tried so hard to tear them apart, yet here they were Christmas morning together without a care in the world. Roger thought of losing Angel and then Mimi to AIDS, watching Benny and Collins leave New York and eventually Mark joined them. Roger still couldn't recall anything besides the blonde next to him that had driven him back to Santa Fe. Nothing but his one best friend. _That's such bullshit._

It seemed to Roger as though he'd been struggling, drowning for months trying to bide his time for the perfect chance, the perfect way to woo Mark. It wasn't until a few weeks ago, at some not-so-subtle pressuring from Collins, that Roger had begun to seriously consider the fact that he was wasting precious time. Time that he and Mark could be spending together as so much more than roommates, more then best friends even. Roger had finally resolved that Christmas would be the best time to try and execute his cunning plan.

Three days prior to Christmas Roger had still failed to come up with a cunning plan, and further resolved to just talk to the filmmaker. At the very worst, Mark would turn him down gently and still be the best fucking friend a guy could ever hope for.

"Mark? I have to tell you something." Roger said slowly, his eyes very firmly on his hands, their movie still playing in the background. Mark quickly focused on Roger, seeming almost as distracted as the musician had been previously while lost in thought.

"Huh? What's up? You feel all right?" Mark had a hand on Roger's forehead before the other boy could chuckle and bat his hand away reassuringly.

"I'm fine, I'm fine. I'm better than fine, in fact. I'm in love. Which of course, is as frustrating and it is wonderful, so I don't know if I'm really fine or just going crazy or rambling at the very least… um… sorry." Roger stopped himself, desperately trying to regroup his thoughts while he waited for Mark's response.

"It's ok. I understand. I'm in a very similar position." Mark trailed off, a sad smile gracing his face as he avoided Roger's eyes.

"In love? With who?" Roger asked, perhaps too defensively.

"You sound jealous." Mark elbowed Roger, teasing. "You wouldn't be in love with me would you? Pretty rocker boy Rog, jealous of anyone else all over his best friend. Sounds like a bestselling gay romance novel to me." Mark had all but draped himself over Roger.

"No! No! Not jealous, just curious. I mean, why wouldn't I be curious? You are my best friend, so it's always my business when you have date or a crush or anything." Mark leaned back, looking put out. Roger felt his chest tighten at the emptiness he recognized clearly in the other boy's eyes. "Do you want me to be jealous?" Roger asked, voice just above a whisper, his eyes on Mark's.

Mark worried his lower lip, unsure if Roger was being situational or at all serious. Mark's nervous look and noncommittal shrug, followed by no real response, was enough fuel for Roger to gamble with.

"Mark, I'm in love with you. So I suppose I would be kinda jealous. I did follow you all the way out here after."

"There's more for you here than just me Rog." Mark blushed, looking away shyly. Roger sounded serious enough, and looked more then serious enough.

"Nothing that's nearly as important." Roger brushed a hand against Mark's jaw, his thumb softly following the lines of the other boy's face. "I can only hope you feel the same." He whispered leaning closer, holding Mark's head to face him.

"You know I do Rog, for me it's always been you." Mark replied just as softly, leaning in so close that their breathe mingled together.

"I love you Mark Cohen." Roger smiled, embracing Mark's whole body closer to him.

"And I love you Roger Davis." Mark felt his eyelids flutter shut, his senses making him feel high as Roger finally closed the distance between them. Roger kissed him longingly, fulfilling every desire and want and need for love he'd been craving from Mark since forever it seemed.

Both boys were content to spend the rest of the holiday inside on the couch watching B-grade movies that were mostly ignored in favor of kissing and teasing and touching and being together.

End.

A.C. – Reviews are love!!


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